The Child-Free Movement

On Issues, Etc.

A short interview of Colleen Carroll Campbell regarding her recent article in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch: The 'perfect' parenthood trap.

Amish "Baby Boom"

An AP story tells us the reason the Amish population is booming:

"The remarkable growth is almost entirely due to the Amish birth rate - many Amish families have five or more children. Kraybill said the Amish retain about 85 percent of the young adults who have to decide whether to remain in the church. The Amish marry within the community, and the total number of converts nationwide is believed to be less than 100, he said.

"About half the Amish are under 18 years old, meaning the community tends to focus much of its energy on young people and schools, Kraybill said."

Another important point in the AP article: "Nearly all Amish descended from a group of about 5,000 in the early 20th century." The title of the article might make one think this "boom" is something new and perhaps short-lived (like the post-WWII baby boom). Instead, this is simply evidence of what the ongoing procreative divine ordinance of God achieves when left relatively unhindered, showing us the rate at which the rest of Christendom would have grown since the "early 20th century" if it hadn't adopted the Margaret Sanger doctrine of Planned Parenthood. (N.B.: even the Amish community has not been entirely unaffected by this. Note the second paragraph down on this page.)

The AP story points out that the "total number of [Amish] converts nationwide is believed to be less than 100."

By contrast, it seems Lutherans are now almost entirely dependent upon conversion to maintain their numbers, and we all know the minimal teaching (if any) that passes for "conversion" in most "Lutheran" churches. Here is a recent anonymous comment on L&P that is worth considering. It quotes this earlier post by Pastor Curtis.

HT: Rebekah at CSPP

C.S. LEWIS & T.S. ELIOT ON CONTRACEPTION

Two Dubious Anniversaries

An article by one of our readers in New Oxford Review.

Kids Optional

From World Magazine, July 17, 2010

Childlessness is becoming more common in the United States. A Pew Research Center study found that 18 percent of women aged 40 to 44 have never had children, compared to 10 percent in 1976. Pew's researchers said the trend is a result of a combination of less social pressure to have children and women delaying marriage to later in life, when the ability to become pregnant has declined. Changing attitudes about the purpose of marriage also seem to be playing a role: A 2007 Pew study found that 41 percent of adults said having children is very important for a successful marriage, down from 65 percent in 1990.


Also in this issue of World: To breed or not to breed

Hope for the LCMS

A humble, confessional, godly man has been elected to lead our Synod. May God keep him faithful to the Truth!

Here is a video of his election and acceptance speech:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5W6OCHL1Yw

And here is his first interview moments later on Issues, Etc.:

http://issuesetc.org/podcast/532071310H2S1.mp3

The Idol of Choice

Contraception affords people the ability to choose against children, against God-given fertility. This pro-choice mentality is the same that drives those who are pro-abortion, even if the pro-choice, pro-contraception crowd stops short of choosing to kill pre-born babies.

I was struck by the sheer bankruptcy of this thinking while hearing people recently describe themselves as “accidents,” “whoopses,” and “mistakes.” While the conversation was largely in jest, as no one of these participants in the conversation probably sees himself as still a “whoops” in the eyes of his parents, and even unintended children can be loved by their parents, it nevertheless belies the pervasiveness of this kind of thinking.

We want to be our own gods. We want the authority to choose how many children we will have. And when a child is born against our planning and desires, when we have to face the reality that there is another God who controls fertility and who gives children as gifts, we call our children “mistakes” to avoid relinquishing control of our own lives to Him who is the Author of Life.

I’m thinking about all this as my wife and I yesterday marked the 7^th anniversary of being joined together by God in marriage. Anniversaries are always bittersweet for us as the age of our marriage and the age of our children reminds us of our real mistakes, of our years of choosing against God’s gift of children.

No child is ever a mistake or an accident. Every child is always a gift. That such a conversation can happen among Christians, even Christians who rejoice in God’s gift of children, whether such gifts are in concert with our plans or not, exposes the shallowness of our thinking and the pervasiveness of our culture’s anti-child, pro-self mentality even in the church. Yuck.

Cross-posted at Hemmersphere

Baseball, Apple Pie, and Procreation

http://hymn-addict.blogspot.com/2010/06/todays-laugh_22.html

"It is a fact that baseball players, especially catchers, started using metal cups --and later hard plastic-- in the 19th century. They did not use hard helmets until about WWII. They must have finally realized that your head is also important to protect."

I wonder if, instead of ignorance, this fact reflects the relative importance given to protecting a man's procreative capacity in the 19th Century compared to the 20th Century. I recall from my little league days that batting helmets were mandatory, but we never wore cups.

Are You Done?

From what I understand mothers are asked this question all the time following the births of their children, sometimes even in the delivery room. Until today, I have never been asked.

This morning I went to my Doctor for a regular checkup. The Lord blessed us with our third child and first son in April, so the receptionist, nurse and doctor all greeted me with congratulations - very nice. Everyone in there knows I'm a pastor and I look like one too when I arrive, dressed in clericals and such - currently too hot for a cassock to wear 'round town.

As I was getting my blood drawn (lousy cholesterol) the nurse asked, "So, now that you have the boy are you done?"

I honestly did not know how to respond other than, "I certainly hope not. The Lord has given us these and I pray He gives us more." No reply to that.

The contraceptive mind must run like this. One has children to get what he wants. Now that I have a masculine child there be no need for anymore, right? I have the BOY, my hunting buddy, the guy to teach how to play baseball, football etc. MY little man, MY guy. There can only be so much attention and love (AND MONEY) to go around. Happy! Content! Finished! Desires Fulfilled! So, Done! Time for the snip snip appointment, or perhaps get my wifey to her doctor to get the tubes put in a knot or whatever other method the human mind has concocted to disrupt or destroy.

Note also the assumption that the Christian pastor must have the mentality of everyone else. He and his bride can only take so much - 2 girls, 1 boy, enough is enough. Done. But then why the question- "Are you done?"

I think it has to be the law written on the heart of all these people who ask. They know that they should not be saying, "I'm done." It has been put into their conscience by the Lord Himself to be fruitful and multiply. Let it be said once again, as with all posts of this nature, we are not dealing with the hard and difficult cases. And so that denial of Life must have company, not only with the spouse but with everyone else. If only we all say that we are DONE, than it will be OK. If only we all together reject the gifts that God Himself gives we will be OK. Safety in numbers; safety then in our choices. Choices that reject God's gift of the lives of human beings. Choices that say "No thanks God, I'm done with You giving me things that you call blessings. I am done with you creating life, people, human beings, children that you fearfully and wonderfully make through the means of the union of husband and wife. I'm done with your Son Jesus wishing the little children to come to Him. Done with Him putting His hands on them and blessing them at the font. I'm done with the very purpose of marriage itself, not by your choosing but by mine. No thank you God, I AM DONE."

I say no thanks to that. The Blessed Holy Trinity is the giver of Life, so let's let Him decide when we're done. No thanks to saying "no thanks" to the Father, (the Maker of Heaven and Earth) to His Son, our Lord Jesus Christ, (In him was life; and the life was the light of men) and to the Holy Spirit, (the Lord and Giver of Life). Let's let it be up to the Blessed Trinity whether we are done, or not. Or whether we'll be given sick children, or healthy children. Let's let Him decide whose going to be living and who is going to be born. Let's even let Him decide when we should die. Let's let Him decide when our parents should die. Let's even let Him decide when our children should die - long after we are dead, d.v. Let's let Him be God, and us be creatures. Let's believe that He really is the one who makes children, that they really are His, and He seems not to be done yet. As of this writing, the Father has not sent His Son to return on the clouds with all His Holy angels.



Plus, who wouldn't want some more of those people up in that picture?

The Great Joy

This morning I presided at the Holy Baptism of two children- twin boys. I was also able to preside over the course of the last five years at the Holy Baptism of their mother, two sisters, and one brother. Dad serves in the US Army and was in Iraq when the twins were born; now he has returned and the boys have been washed clean in the blood of Jesus Christ. What great joy, the Lord preserving the father of five, and the Lord saving the two little ones by His Name and promise. Lots of joy to go around. I pray that Our Father will give this family some more great joy in the future, and that He'll use me as His instrument to administer the salvation that is full and free in His Son.

New Synodical Resolution on Birth Control

...to be considered in convention this summer!

A reader alerted us on 4/27/10 to an overture for the LCMS convention on the subject of birth control. The LCMS Reporter Online now reports that the Theology and Church Relations floor committee has declined the resolution on birth control, as was easily predicted, but surprisingly it was declined with a resolution composed by the floor committee itself, as follows:

...a final resolution declines three congregation-submitted overtures -- to end all official theological talks with the ELCA; to request the Synod president not to attend ELCA Churchwide Assemblies; and to return to a Scriptural position on birth control. The committee cited the encouragement of 2Tim: 2:25 to "correct opponents with gentleness" so that God might grant them repentance as reasons for the first two declinations. As for the third overture, the committee noted that the Synod has never had an official position on birth control."

Yes, that is true. There was that strange 1981 CTCR report on sexuality referred to the synod for "study" - but it was never adopted in convention. It is also interesting to note that the recent resolution that was submitted did not claim the LCMS had its own official position on birth control. It stated the following:

Resolved, That the 2010 LCMS convention declare that the LCMS still accepts the scriptural position of Martin Luther on birth control and the position long promoted in the LCMS by such ortho- dox LCMS theologians as John H. C. Fritz, Walter Maier, Martin Nauman, Theodore Laetch, and many others.

It is precisely because the Purple Palace has never officially adopted a resolution in contradiction to the longstanding teaching of the church catholic (including 400+ years of unanimous Lutheran condemnation of contraception), that the original overture was simply suggesting that this longstanding Scriptural position of the church (the one promoted on this blog) should be acknowledged by all who honor their fathers in the faith. No resolutions need to be rescinded. The truth only needs to be reaffirmed.

The "democracy of the dead" has spoken loudly and clearly for thousands of years, and its unanimous voice has only been very recently (and quite unofficially) contradicted by the chronological snobbery of "the small and arrogant oligarchy of those who merely happen to be walking about." False teaching on this subject has, indeed, been published by CPH and propagated in our seminaries, dismissing our fathers in the faith as ignorant and unenlightened while praising the likes of Margaret Sanger.

The Baby Conference

Babies: Blessing or Burden?
a conference from Vision Forum Ministries

There are very important distinctions between "Quiverfull Lutherans" and the typical Christian Reconstructionist brand of "Quiverfilling" found amongst our Reformed brothers and sisters. As the Vision Forum is distinctively Calvinist, I wonder how hard it would be to pick the bones out of this fish. Nevertheless, I have found quite a bit of the material produced by these people and their friends to be a great blessing (for instance, this book co-authored by one of the presenters at this conference).

Thou Shalt Not Steal

Ergo, Don't Have Babies

At home in the zoo

They've never used these cats in a Yaz commercial, yet, but they might as well. Cats, even the ferocious, man-eating ones, are cute.

This is in the Big Cat Country at the St. Louis Zoo. In case you can't read the text, this is what it says:

"The need for contraception in zoos may seem surprising, but it is vital for successful breeding programs. The Wildlife Contraception Center helps scientists facilitate controlled pairings. This high-tech matchmaking allows individuals to live in natural social settings. To make sure only pairs recommended by the SSP breed, some cats are put on birth control. Sometimes even the same type and brand a human would use!"

Medicating against Motherhood

Great article at the Hausvater Project by Rev. Robert C. Baker:

As the Pill Turns 50, a New Generation Seeks to Rediscover Marital Chastity

Growing Up to Be a Child

I gave this high school baccalaureate homily yesterday in Bancroft, Nebraska. It is about being child-like and open to God’s blessings, even if we don’t expect or plan on them, because we have a true, caring Father in heaven.

You are about to take a large step. You are leaving the security of your family on the way to becoming a grown-up. I'm not going to burden you with changing the world, though. Even if it were possible, that is too much to lay on someone. Instead, my advice is to be child-like.

This may be exactly what your trying to avoid, but this is what God Himself would have you do. Adults seem to have everything planned out; they act in control. That is what you are supposed to become. So, you are told to worry about your education, career, family, and success. That is quite a lot.

If you take that route, pretty soon you are worrying about how you are going to pay for your unborn child's college tuition, before you have even started college. That doesn't sound very fun. What I am saying is don't lose that child-like wonder. Don't narrow your future based on your own limited imagination. The only thing I can promise is that your future will not turn out like you have planned it. To be a in-control, set-in-stone, perfectly planned-out adult, is not possible. You have a heavenly Father who likes to chuckle at our plans. We are all children, even if we don't admit it. And that is the only way to approach the future---without depression or psychosis. Because someone else is in control.

To children, life is a mystery. They embrace the unknown and get excited about the many possibilities. They ask questions and want to know why. They think like the words of Psalm 8: When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him? You made him a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.

We really are like grass, that is here today and gone tomorrow. Old age and forgetfulness will come to us all. If you live long enough, you will likely need someone else to dress you. Don't aim to change the world. After all, fathers set their children's goals.

You have a perfect Father, who will be a father to you. In Jesus Christ, we have forgiving God, who truly cares. "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" [Matt 6]

Enlightened adults act like they have it all figured out. But what joy is there in knowing the end of the story? Being a dependent child is more freeing and interesting. Children are free to make mistakes. A good father might let you skin your knee, but not break your neck.

We need a perfect Father. When sins overwhelm and your plans disintegrate, be a helpless child. Then you are strong in the heavenly Father's strength. This Father sacrificed His perfect Son Jesus, so you could be His child. So be a believing child. A loved and protected child. Don't worry about your future, but trust in His fatherly care. You are very valuable to Him, whether you have a career or not. This is the only way to have true life.

Children do not aim to be successful, they instead try to please their father. In this way, let the Lord determine your success. Be open to His blessings, even if you didn't exactly choose them. Let God worry about your future. Just enjoy what He gives you. After all, life is short on earth. We would rather be with our true Father anyway.

A song-writer [Bob Dylan] once wrote: "He not busy being born is busy dying.'' To be a child, a child of God, is to be alive. Just strive for what is right and do your best. He will lay out a good path for you. He will pick you up when you fall. Even less than perfect earthly fathers do that. A child sees each day as a gift, not a burden. Never stop learning. Even if you are done with homework, you need a Good Teacher. Jesus calls and instructs by His Word. Listen and learn from Him. He will not flunk you. He will guide you to the heavenly Father.

Classes are almost over, but there is much to learn and see and do. So much, that I hope you can say this, as a child of God, about your high school years: "I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now. [Bob Dylan again]" Amen.

You Must vs. You Can

When troubled or worried, I always used to tell myself that I'd just have to trust God. And, when trials would overwhelm those I love, I’d tell them as well: “You’ll just have to trust God.”

In recent times, I have instead learned to put it this way: I CAN trust God! (as in, God is entirely trustworthy, I can trust Him 100%!!!)

It’s amazing the difference there is between thinking "I have to” and "I can.”

This is how I can go to sleep at night and face each morning with peace: “…for into Thy hands I commend myself, my body and soul, and ALL THINGS!”

Of course, this doesn’t get us off the hook from striving with our best efforts to fulfill our vocations. However, it does free us from worry and fear. Even through all our failures and sins, God will turn all things for good. We do the best we can, and only with God’s help, knowing that we can trust Him for the results. There is tremendous comfort in this attitude toward God, because it simply looks at His attitude toward us.

Like an infant in the arms of a loving parent, we CAN trust God. An infant doesn’t think: “I have to trust mom and dad.” An infant just trusts.

The Law says: You must trust the Lord.
The Gospel, on the other hand, says: You can trust the Lord!

In the Bible story depicted in stained glass in the header of this blog, Jesus says:

Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.

Lord, grant us all such childlike trust!

Death of a Dream

Last week was National Infertility Week. With Mother's Day coming soon, and Father's Day not long beyond, with Confirmation Sunday just recently passed for many of our congregations, it is worth pausing to remember those from whom God has withheld the blessing of children and offered instead a journey of patience. More awkwardly, we also remember those who have withheld God's blessing from themselves, only to later desire it, but not find it.

The following article traces one couple's difficult quest to conceive: Death of a Dream. The article concludes with the realization that whether childless or child rich, one must wait upon the Lord who blesses in His own manner and His own timing. Sadly, however, the article begins with a recognition (though not so clearly a regret) that the couple's recent struggle for fertility had been preceded by a five-year insistence against fertility:

When my husband and I married, we made a deal: We'd wait five years before starting a family. Five years would allow us to start our careers, be on better financial footing, and have time just for us. So when the moratorium passed, with anticipation, I stopped using birth control.

After 12 months of not taking the Pill and still buying tampons, I started to research the subject. "Eight-five percent of couples trying to conceive will become pregnant within one year." Red flag. We were already past that.

It is odd how frequently pastors emphasize in pre-marital counseling that marriage takes three--the husband, the wife, and Christ who holds them together--and yet when it comes to self-imposed infertility, so many couples follow in the path of the woman writing this article: "When my husband and I married, we made a deal...." Where was Christ in that arrangement? For five years she and her husband pushed away God's gift of children, and then after one year of failed attempts to conceive, followed by some invasive procedures, they felt their dream of having a child was dying. How alive had that dream been during their first five years of marriage?

If we, as Christians, truly want our dreams to live, we must put to death the sinful flesh, drowning that Old Adam through daily contrition and repentance, asking God to forgive us for our prior attitudes and actions that have sought to thwart His will, and to give us the strength to rightfully seek and accept His current will for our lives. We must let our own dreams die, and learn to dream the dreams that He has for us. Just as those who delayed coming to the Wedding Feast had their invitations revoked, so also God's gift of fertility may only be available for a time.

Marriage and Family - Rev. Dr. and Mrs. Robert Preus - 1988

In 1988 at Concordia Theological Seminary in Fort Wayne, the President of the Seminary Rev. Dr. Robert D. Preus and his lovely wife Donna were asked to give a presentation to the seminarians and their wives on the subject of marriage and family - especially as it relates to life in the parish. With the help of Apple's Garageband software, I have extracted and digitally remastered the audio from a VHS copy of the presentation provided to me by Rev. M. L. F. Freiberg in May of 2007.

This 94 minute presentation is a treasure trove for not only seminarians and pastors, but for all parents.

You can right click and download this MP3 and listen to it on your iPod or another MP3 player if you wish. You will want to listen to this several times to mine all of the gold nuggets contained therein. In addition, here is a PDF of the handout of Bible verses Dr. Preus mentions in the discussion.

NFP: Why We Don't Bother

Excellent guest post by Pr. H. R. Curtis over at CSPP:

http://concordiansisters.blogspot.com/2010/04/guest-post-nfp-why-we-dont-bother.html

For Better Not for Worse

A Manual of Christian Matrimony
by
WALTER A. MAIER, PH. D.

http://olcc.us/files/olcc.us/Maier%20-%20FBNFW/

(Birth control is covered in Chapter 27 - not scanned online yet as of this post)